Welcome to Parenthood!

The family spent its first Saturday afternoon in America hanging out in our local emergency room.

Wynn had a cough on and off while we were in China, and we'd given her Triaminic, which worked quite well. She was doing better, so we didn't give it much thought. Then last night a about 3 AM she woke up and made this "I can't breathe" sound and proceeded to throw up in the bed. She slept most of the morning, and by the time afternoon rolled around, she was getting feverish and couldn't even keep down a couple teaspoons of water. She didn't act like she felt bad at all, but we decided to risk being labeled as the first time parents who over-react every time their child sniffles. We took her to the ER and are so glad we did.

After being looked over by two nurses and the doctor and enduring a throat culture and a couple x-rays, Wynn was diagnosed with pneumonia. She took the whole medical exam thing in stride, but refused to open her mouth for the throat culture. We have this game we play with her where I say the Chinese word for nose and she points to hers. Then I say the word for tongue, and she sticks hers out. We tried to get her to play this to help the doctor look in her mouth, but Wynn was totally on to the fact that we were trying to trick her. She gave me this look like "No dice, Mama" and kept her mouth closed.

The doctor gave her a shot of antibiotics and a prescription for more to take for the next seven days. Two hours after she got the shot, she was up and active as ever - and BEGGING for food. We were supposed to start her slowly with clear fluids, but, again, no dice. She would not stop until she was presented with a bowl of extremely watered-down Cream of Wheat that I'd kindly stirred some strawberry syrup into. When that was gone, she wanted more, so we moved on to banana.

We coaxed her away from the food long enough to give her a bath and brush her teeth to get the vomit smell out of her mouth. Then she stood pointing at the kitchen and CRIED until I ponied up with some more Cream of Wheat.

She slept most of the day, so what are the odds that she'll sleep at all tonight?

Ann

As you mull over the night we're going to have with our newly-energized toddler, enjoy the lovely pictures of Renmin Park, Nanning, China. (It was about a block from our hotel.)

Photo Special Edition!

Smog in Beijing


Beijing Traffic

Us at the Airport in Beijing


The Bus We Rode to the Tarmac


The Highway into Nanning


View of Nanning from our Hotel Window


When They Handed Wynn to Ann


The Part They Warned Us About


First Time Wynn Sat on Mom's Lap with No Tears


The Whole Family by a Rice Paddy Outside Nanning


The Scenery in Guangxi is Amazing!


The View from The White Swan in Guangzhou


Wynn Flapping her Arms for More Tomatoes


Favorite Jelly Flavor: Strawberry


Reading with Baba


She LOVES the Remote

Monkey off my back...

Ann has been doing most of the posting since we hooked up with Wynn. It is difficult to type with a toddler hanging to you.

(It's also difficult when you're sick and on the toilet and your screaming, tearful daughter busts open the bathroom door and demands you pick her up and hold her on your lap.)

She didn't have a nap this afternoon, so she passed out on the bed about 19:15. Ah, finally some time to have a grown-up conversation with Ann, read the blog postings, and just relax.

Some random observations:

* Traffic. Lane markings are merely suggestions. Turning around in the middle of the street with oncoming traffic is just fine. Turn signals are rarely used. There are plenty of police, but I never see them doing anything. The bicycles have no reflectors or headlights. Yet there is a fluid grace to how everything moves here, as if the drivers, bike riders, and pedestrians have a sixth sense. The thought of "a school of fish" came to me this morning as we went for a 9 am stroller expedition. I have seen only one accident, and that was a mere fender bender in Beijing. It is terrifying and fascinating at the same time to ride through these streets, yet these drivers must be among the best in the world...

* Music in public spaces. I suspect there is a regulation that all hotels, lobbies, public transport stations, etc. must play "Smooth Jazz Rendition of Western Popular" radio channel. Same stuff everywhere we go. I understand Kenny G has the kind of popularity here that David Hasselhof has in Germany. While eating breakfast, we hear really bad smooth jazz renditions of "Dixie", "Auld Lang Syne", "Jingle Bells", "Greensleeves", some kind of medley of "I Just Called to Say I Love You" and Michael Bolton, one Russian military anthem, and such. (Nothing like hearing fond recollections of slavery in mellow tones while you have your fried noodles and melon slices in the morning.) We hear people whistling Christmas carols all the time.

* How beauty is portrayed. The representations we see on TV here of "idealized" Chinese men and women emphasize:
- Intelligence, both academic and street-smarts
- Modest, conservative fashion -- we're talking Gap / Target / Nordstrom kind of styles. Clean, simple patterns for Western clothing, and of course traditional dress is admired.
- The "bad boy" image never fails to help a lady in need and is clean-cut in his own way; the "girl next door" is modest yet sharp, and always melts the men's hearts.
- Much too thin based on what we Westerners could manage, given our lifestyle and genetic heritage. You do see, however, many ads for diet pills (which look like uppers to us), fat melt-away shoes, body-slimming underwear, all sorts of dietary supplements, "keep your hair jet black" formula, etc. If you want to sell your snake oil, cast an American guy in a lab coat; also, flash lots of English words on the screen (doesn't matter if they relate to what is being sold.) Play the ad incessantly, 4 or 5 times in the same commercial break. (There is a pill reportedly made from Green Apple Extract [grown in South Carolina USA] which binds to body fat and flushes it away, apparently instantly and with bolts of electricity. There is a 15-second cut of the ad, a 30-second, 1-minute, and 2-minute. Tuesday night I watched all the versions cycle through nonstop for 10 minutes on one of the Nanning local stations before I had to change the channel ... like a train wreck, you can't help yourself from watching it. I want to get it on DVD to play for everyone back home...)

* Integration of the military into everyday life. Perhaps to be expected. But at Renmin Park here in Nanning, the kids can play shoot 'em up in MiG-15s with pretend machine guns. The lake has a section with floating mines, and kids can pedal out in little destroyers and attack submarines. Yes, we took pictures... Oh, did we mention you could buy surplus military uniforms / helmets / other gear at our Beijing supermarket?

* One of the local Nanning stations, instead of running TV programs, devotes itself to running text messages called in by viewers (for a fee of course.) In the afternoons they run a bowling video game (use your cellphone to text in direction and power)and also a knights-and-dragons qwest type video game. Winners get valuable prizes -- cash, small electronics. Gambling yes, but an interesting use of the available tech that we don't do in the States.

* No "Weather Channel" here. They could really use it. As a Minnesotan, I want 15-minute explanations of how this cold front is going to interact with that low-pressure system, etc. It's good background noise too. Though, "Shanghai Idol aka the Sprite Show" is growing on me...

Ah, my brain feels much better now for getting all that out.

--Scott

Last Day in Nanning

We were glad to have very little that had to be done today since both of us are feeling a little under the weather. We don't know if it was something we ate yesterday or the cumulative effect of ten days of buffet breakfasts, extreme heat, and a whole bunch of stress. Scott's borne the brunt of the sickness so far, but my turn may still come.

Hannah took us to a street market in Nanning this morning. It was kind of like a permanent flea market, but most of the stalls were selling fresh flowers and plants (lots of bamboo, lots of beautiful orchids). The other stalls sold small trinkets and knick knacks - wood carvings, tea pots, five foot tall statues of Chairman Mao (which would be kinda cool to have out in the front yard ...). We only made one purchase: a pair of lucky fish to hang up at our house.

Wynn is getting even more relaxed and playful around us. She still has her moments, but things are going so much more smoothly than they were two days ago. Scott has noticed that she's interested in ALL of her toys now instead of focusing on just one. She's also playing much more independently; she can entertain herself longer knowing that we're nearby. (She used to need to be touching one of us ALL the time.)

I know, everyone thinks their own child is brilliant, but we truly are surprised to see how quickly she catches on to things and how much she remembers from one day to the next. She was very good this morning at breakfast about complying when we told her that she couldn't have any more bun with jelly until she sat down in the highchair - no standing allowed. When I told her to give her puppy toy a kiss, she brought him up to her face and planted a big smooch on him. Then she laughed. As she saw us starting to pack this afternoon, she put all her blocks in a gift bag and carried them over to me; she set the bag inside my suitcase and looked at me as if to say, "We're going to want to take these along."

Wynn has figured out that we're "hers". She gives Hannah and other people that same skeptical look she used to give us. When someone comes over at breakfast to tell her how beautiful she is, she leans over closer to us. She also doesn't like to have other people - even Hannah - touch her face. She gently puts her hand up and brushes them aside. Sometimes she tightens up her mouth and gives them a quick shake of the head that is a definite "no". We take these as good signs that she is starting to bond to us and that we're not going to have the issue of her being indiscriminately affectionate - wanting complete strangers to pick her up and hug her. Scott and I would both decribe ourselves as being slightly aloof when we first meet people, but we form strong bonds with the people we choose to ally oursleves with; it appears that Wynn's very much like us.

We had sent a set of questions to the orphanage before we left, and today Hannah translated their answers for us. Much of what they said we'd already figured out by spending a few days with her (she cries a lot before she falls asleep, taking her outside to play cheers her up, etc.). What we didn't know is that for her to drink, she needs to be given her formula in a spoon. Well, no wonder we couldn't get her to drink the darn formula! We were giving it to her the wrong way! They also wrote that she loves music, which we had figured out from the way she started dancing to the Mandopop musak in the department store and how she started rocking and tapping to "Shanghai Idol", which is on TV every night. They also told us that she loves the Teletubbies, so I guess we'll need to get her some DVD's at Target so she can watch something familiar when we get back to Minnesota.

We're off to Guangzhou tomorrow, where we SHOULD have the ability to download pictures again, so you can all see such classic images as "smearing her jelly-covered fingers on mama's lap" and "running around the hotel room with her hands in the air making airplane noises". It's a good show.

Ann

Out and About

Last night after dinner we went for a walk in nearby Renmin Park with the other CHSFS family. The park's only a couple blocks from our hotel, and it's absolutely lovely: lots of shade trees, a lake, all kinds of exotic plants and flowers. We both said that it was like walking in the Como Park Conservatory - without the glass dome. The people of Nanning go to this park to relax and escape the traffic and crowds. There were young couples sitting together in the pavillion, families out for a stroll, and some older folks practicing their tai chi. We tried putting Wynn in the baby carrier for the first time - success! She rode along cooperatively, and Scott's arms got a much needed break.

We got back from our walk at about 7:15 last night, and Wynn promptly passed out on the bed. She slept straight through until 5 AM. Scott changed her diaper around 10 o'clock, and she slept right through it. Ahh.

Since she has no interest in the crib and is a heavy duty "roller" in the bed, we finally came up with a system where we can ALL relax and sleep through the night. It involves all three of us sleeping in a twin bed together, but it works! Scott sleeps in the normal position, my pillow and head go down by his feet, and Wynn is tucked safely in the "nest" between us. (We're REALLY hoping the hotel in Guangzhou has bigger beds.)

Hannah took us on a tour of the countryside today. It was like nothing we've ever seen. Lush green farmlands are punctuated with massive slices of mountain that suddenly shoot up from the ground. (We keep saying, "I feel like I'm on location for a James Bond movie," to each other.) When we got to Guangzhou we should be able to download pictures again, so check back to see them.

Hannah took us to a small farming village. She knew the villagers there and took us on a walking tour so we could take pictures of the people, their homes, their farms, and the scenery that surrounds them. Everyone there was friendly and smiling at us, cooing at the little girls being carried around by their big American fathers. It was definitely exotic, but strangely familiar since, even though we're city folks, we've spent enough time near farmlands at home to be able to tell the difference between the pig barn and the cow barn based on smell alone. The temperature today was ninety-eight degrees with a dewpoint around eighty, and we Westerners were certainly feeling it. Hannah looked at our beet red faces and innocently asked, "Oh, is it too hot?" (We have discovered that, even though she comes from the tropics, Wynn is a Minnesotan at heart. She's happiest when we're riding in the van with the air conditioning cranked, and she kicks all the covers off of her at night. This girl likes to be COOL - just like Mama.)

Wynn has decided that riding in her stroller is okay by her - another break for Daddy's arms. :-)

We can't get her to drink the formula the orphanage sent with her, but she'll definitely have a bite of whatever we're having. She ate an ENORMOUS bowl of congee at noon today. We were both amazed that such a tiny person could pack away so much food. She's also figured out that I'm the one who's packing snacks, so we're doing a lot of our initial bonding by her asking me for food and me giving it to her. She still wants to sit on Scott's lap when she's eating, but she figured out that I'm the one holding the spoon.

Tomorrow we're going with Hannah to buy some souvenirs of Guangxi in the morning; then we'll just relax for the afternoon. We're getting tired of hotel food - there's no grocery store or Western food near our hotel - so we're looking forward to moving on to life on Shamian Island in Guangzhou starting Saturday. Word on the street is they have a place where you can get real burgers and fries. :-)

One week from today we'll be home.
With a fridge full of food.
And a queen-sized bed.
And tap water we can drink.
And our friends and family around us.

Ann

Wal-Mart, Chinese Style

Our trek for the day was to the Wal-Mart and a department store in downtown Nanning. We were happy to have Hannah with as our guide to explain the shopping procedure to us: you pick what you like, give it to the clerk, the clerk writes up a ticket for the item, you take all your tickets to the cashier and pay, then you go back to the department where you found each item and give them the slip to say you've paid. Only then are you given the merchandise. Pretty cumbersome system, but that's how they do it.

We picked up a pair of squeaky shoes for her at the department store, along with a couple little outfits and some LEGO's.

The Wal-Mart has several floors, escalators, and even its own parking ramp underneath it. This is where we bought a stroller - which she, so far, refuses to ride in - and stocked up on some diapers, bottled water, etc. Sometimes kids regress a bit after the trauma of being placed with their family, and Wynn has lost a bit of her toilet training. She's peed on the floor of our hotel room twice and pooped once. At least it was solid. And not on the marble floor in the lobby.

Wynn is still clinging to Scott; I am generally tolerated, but not who she wants to be with. Hannah explained that it is normal for the child to bond with one parent first; bonding with two at once would be too much for her. It's hard on me to not have my affection for her returned, and Scott's getting worn down by being constantly needed. He finally managed to get a bit of a nap this afternoon, "With twenty pounds of toddler on me," he says. She will take food from me and will let me join in playing with her toys. She also spent about an hour in the tub with me yesterday afternoon. She was pitching a fit, and I needed a bath anyway. I got in, and then Scott brought her in to "visit". I lured her in with some tub toys we'd brought. She and I got to spend some time together, and we got her cleaned up too.

We've noticed that she is very clever at figuring out how things go together. As we were stuggling to figure out how to connect the handles to her sippy cup, she reached out and took it, showing us how to put it together with this look on her face that said, "It goes like THIS." Her favorite games involve putting things together and taking them apart again. When she doesn't want a toy or is done playing with it, she puts the pieces back in the box and puts it aside.

We're still getting some crying out of her - not the blind rage that we had at first - but still quite a bit. It's a comfort to us to be on the ninth floor of the hotel; they put ALL the new adoptive families here together. Their reasoning is that it's the non-smoking floor, but it has the unintentional bonus of letting us hear everybody else's precious new child screaming their heads off, and we get to see the other drool-encrusted, exhausted-looking parents walking the halls in a daze. We're missing our families and friends at home SO much, but there is a sort of Band of Brothers thing going on here.

I have noticed that sometimes her crying is intentional. Last night she had a couple picture books she was flipping through rather nicely; then, she quietly closed both of them back to the front covers and set them beside her gently. She even nudged them away from her like, "I don't want those getting in my way." Sure enough, she started bellowing. Didn't want to get any tears on those books, I guess.

Hannah has arranged for a van to take us on a tour to see some of the countryside of Guangxi tomorrow. She figured out that we Americans wither in the heat and humidity pretty quickly, so she's promised that we can mostly just ride in the air conditioned van, getting out at a few sites to take pictures of the mountains and scenery. Sounds perfect to us.

We bought our airline tickets for our trip to Guangzhou. We fly out of Nanning on Saturday afternoon at 12:45. It's only an hour from here, so our first attempt at flying with a toddler will be brief. Our SECOND flight with her will be a little over 7,ooo miles, though. At least we'll be home at the end of it. :-)

Wynn just polished off her second bowl of congee for the day. They really should just keep a tureen of the stuff by the elevator bay on the ninth floor; ALL the babies are fanatical about it. Hopefully, a full belly and another day of getting used to us will translate to a more peaceful evening and a good night's sleep.

Ann

2 Hours to Toddler

We met with our facilitator, Hannah, at 10:30 this morning to work on Chinese adoption documents. There is one other family from CHSFS here with us (also from the Twin Cities!) so the paperwork was completed in just half an hour. Hannah answered our questions and spelled out the schedule for the next several days, and then we went to lunch.

At our paperwork meeting this morning, we got to see new pictures of Wynn - taken just a few days ago. She has quite a bit more hair now, and, for the first time we've seen, has kind of a skeptical look on her face. The picture will be her passport photo, so we're going with the story that her expression is more about the fact that she was being posed in such a particular way by a stranger rather than an indication that they gave her the news that WE'RE going to be her parents. :-)

We also got to hear a bit from her updated file - some notes about her personality, feeding and sleeping schedules, etc. They describe her as being a bit stubborn and say that she cries for a long time when she's mad. (Ann's mom is smiling right now, because that's pretty much a word for word description of Ann as a toddler.) Apparently, sometimes you do get a child who's "just like you."

It is now 1:45 in the afternoon. We will leave the hotel to get Wynn at 3:20. Ann is trying to get some rest; I am too nervous.

We're glad to have the computer here, but trying to download photos last night crashed the darned thing. We'll keep trying, but you may have to be satisfied with narrative rather than pictures until we get to Guangzhou.

Wish us luck!
(and patience)

And now, to Nanning

This morning was the first time on our trip where we did not need to be at the hotel lobby at 8:30 to get on a tour bus. Instead, today was Checkout Day for Beijing ... suitcases in the hallway at 11:00 and checkout at 11:30.

We are definitely glad to have come to China several days early so as to get used to the time zone, just be tourists, and get the general hang of how to take care of yourself and get things done here.

We now know that food you buy at the grocery store is incredibly inexpensive (to our standards.) We've gotten bottled water for 2 to 5 yuan (so around 25-75 cents US) and a can of Coke is 5 yuan. A McDonald's double cheeseburger is just 6 yuan, and it is very good. Nestle makes little containers of ice cream here - about a pint (one of those Ben & Jerry's) - and it is also just 6 yuan. And what we would recognize as "juice boxes" of milk go for just 2 yuan. There's always a corner store or supermarket nearby, and you just watch the cash register to figure out how much to pay. Plus, it's a whole lot of fun to see how people shop!

Most of the other families in our group came in a day behind us, and a few only arrived last night! The folks who landed in Beijing last night were given the fast tour of Tiananmen and the Forbidden City (leave at 8, back by 11), which seems crazy to us now that we have experienced Beijing traffic (takes no weekend breaks) and know firsthand just how long it takes simply to walk straight through, stopping for nothing. And then to head straight out to the airport? They are really going to be dragging tomorrow...

The smog in Beijing has steadily worsened since we arrived. This morning was really awful -- leaden gray sky with a glowing red sun. Yesterday, we couldn't see the mountains from several kilometers out during our Great Wall trip. Today, it was difficult to see to the end of the block. Even now - 9 pm - my throat is still achy, and all I did outside was to walk to McD's to get some Chicken McNuggets for Ann's lunch, plus get on and off the bus to the airport, and take the bus to the airplane.

Our flight (Shenzhen Airlines) was scheduled to leave Beijing at 1:50 pm, but when we checked in, we found out they were pulling the departure time forward! So from check-in we had only 30 minutes before boarding. We hustled out to the gate (lower level) and waited just a short while before a (not air conditioned) bus pulled up and over 100 people piled on board. We drove several miles, crossing one main runway and tunneling under another, before pulling up to our bird, parked the furthest out on the tarmac. We scrambled out of the bus and climbed aboard, and waited. About 15 minutes later another bus pulled up, and several dozen more people climbed the stairs into our aircraft. In all, we didn't get off the ground until about 1:40.

Our flight took 3 hours. We climbed up above the smog after about 20 minutes, but it was easily another 75 minutes before we reached the edge of the smog... it seems to be trapped over Northern China for now, but next week you folks in America may have some interesting weather... We dodged thunderstorms for a while before landing in our new base of operations for the next week, Nanning.

Coming through the clouds over Guangxi Province (where we are now) and seeing forests, lush farm fields, and wide-open space was an amazing shift from the dry, urban landscape we had gotten used to. The drive from the airport into the city was traffic-free, and both the airport and city of Nanning are CLEAN - meticulously groomed, polished, and unlittered.

Looking out our 9th-floor window, we have a panorama view of the skyline. Seeing blue sky - and even some of the sunset - was a pleasant switch from the week so far! The hotel seems very nice, and they even have a computer here in the room we can use, unlimited, for just 20 yuan per day (so our concerns about not being able to post frequently are now relieved.)

Tomorrow morning at 10:30 we sit down with our coordinator here to fill out paperwork, and at 3:00 we are scheduled to get our little girl! Even though we are exhausted (in fact we haven't been up this late since we landed in Beijing), we wonder just how much sleep we are actually going to achieve tonight.

Everything changes tomorrow. We will have a lot to talk about!

--Scott